The Scottish war-chief McMac and his war-bud Lord Mildew were heading home after a long, hard day of slaughter and mayhem. Behind them was the whiskey-soaked battlefield upon which their foul-breathed minions had totally vomited upon the enemy — the cowardly, beef-eating English — had thrown them crying into their warm beer back to their moustachioed mothers and pink-cheeked fathers.Mounted upon their champing war-nags, bollocks bruised and battered, the noble haggis-lovers clip-clopped their weary way up and down a lonely stretch of heather-cursed witch-land, as mountainous and boring as this very tale itself.
Wistful and witless McMac turned his mind to poignant memories of his beloved Lady McMac, she of the hair of gold and lips incarnadine. In his mind’s eye he pictured her within the Castle’s laundry chamber, the flagstone floor strewn with crumpled camisoles, chemises, kilts and kirtles.
CONTINUES in Hags to Haggis, out now at Amazon http://amzn.to/18CA28w
Take your brain for a walk on the wild side.Tales of Whiskey and War-nags, Manticores and Escapegoats, Debottlenecking and Desilofication, Illustrated"> Tales of Whiskey and War-nags, Manticores and Escapegoats, Debottlenecking and Desilofication, Illustrated. Read 'em and weep.
HAGS TO HAGGIS (warfare, whiskey and washer-wimmen) Upon their champing war-nags, Scottish war-chief McMac and his war-bud Lord Mildew encounter three loathesome hags upon a blasted heath.
A MAN NAMED MANNY (a maniac, a mantra, a manticore) Manny lives in a Manhattan mansion manifestly too large for one man…
THE EVIL SANDWICH (reflux deluxe) A courageous sandwich-hunter encounters a vile and vicious footlong from the very maw of Hell herself…
