The Scottish warchief McMac and his war-buddy Lord Mildew were heading home after a tiring day of slaughter and mayhem. Behind them was the whiskey-soaked battlefield upon which their foul-breathed minions had totally vomited upon the enemy -- the cowardly beef-eating English -- had thrown them crying into their warm beer back to their moustachioed mothers and pink-cheeked fathers.
Mounted upon their bitterly champing war-nags, bollocks bruised and battered the noble haggis-lovers clip-clopped their weary way up and down a lonely stretch of heather-cursed witch-land, as mountainous and boring as this very tale itself...
